Blog@GraceJunction

Recently I was in Mumbai for a ten day training for Private Banking (a division that handles only ultra High Networth Individuals). This field is very polished and the Relationship Manager’s(RM) meet only the business biggies of that city or state. These RM’s are highly regarded by the company and they themselves have a big inflated ego, “pride value” and all other values we can think of. The training was for both domestic and International RM’s coming from different countries.

These RM’s were very touchy about small small things. Somebody was complaining about the hotel not being a five star and being a three star, somebody about food, somebody about the Air-Conditioner et cetera. But I want to share one incident whick kept me thinking for a long while and prompted me to come up with this blog.

In one of our breaks some of us went to the wash room. On entering the wash room one of the RMs, based at Bahrain, got his shirt pulled off by some sharp obeject, possibily on the door. The right side of the shirt tore off, near the hand, in the size of a “pin hole”. This guy looked at the shirt for a while trying to see if it could be hidden or adjusted in some or the other way. After few minutes he said to us, “I’m going to meet the General Manager of the hotel and take him to task”!! (more…)

Recently I was passing by a transport godown near our factory. I passed by that part of their godown where they were taking in the goods. It was a fairly big door they had there. But a little outside the door they had “Size Restriction Bars” (I don’t know what else to call it). It’s a steel structure made with heavy channels (often rails), with two vertical bars and one horizontal bar (a shape similar to the greek alphabet “Pi”).

Though the door was bigger, all the goods that could go inside had to pass through this “Size Restriction Bars” and only then the transporters could “book in” the goods for transit to other places. Probably the size restriction was keeping in mind the size of the truck container or it was a size restriction put on that particular godown. Whatever it was, the message was very clear: If you have dimensions that cannot meet our standards, go away.

The heavy steel bars made sure that this standard set by the company management would not give into pushing by mere mortals, perhaps not even a heavy truck!! The decision was final and binding on all, even if it was the biggest player in our industrial estate! (more…)

“Life-On your Terms”. This is the quote I came across on the cover page of an investment review magazine of one of the biggest banks in the country; for some reasons I’ll keep it unnamed.

The magazine is a research magazine which shows the past performance of all the investment products available in the market. In short the magazine is giving us data to analyze and understand where to put our money so that we can make more money and when we have more money we can live our “Life on our Terms”.

But can we really live “life on our terms”?

If i see it from the material perspective may be “yes”. You see people around us taking control of their life: deciding what to eat, drink, when to drink and with whom to live, what brand, and even pre marital, post marital relations et cetera. These are components that people consider when defining “life on their terms”, doing what they want and when they want without strings and without any moral standards. (more…)

Some years ago when youngsters would be free and would want to unwind themselves, they would meet up with friends and have fun. The fun element would be derived from the various games they played, movies, music, lunch or dinner at a good restaurant, or just simple chitchat at a coffee shop or an ice cream parlor. But today if you think that the usual hotspots would be one of the coffee shops or favorite restaurants, you may be wrong. Those are a bit outdated now. The latest ‘cool’ hangouts are hookah bars or restaurants offering hookah facility. The latest trend rampantly creeping in amongst the teenagers and youngsters is the hookah trend, which is mistakenly believed to have no health implications. A new tobacco fad to attract the youngsters it seems. Another challenge for the government and anti tobacco campaigns trying to curb tobacco usage and smoking. So hookah trend is in. Is it in to devour the moralities, valuable time, health,talent and parents’ money or is just an instrument to relieve stress or a mere substitute for cigarettes?

What is a hookah used for anyway? Is it trendy? A cultural tradition, social activity or a substitute cigarette vice? A hookah, shisha or narghile is a water pipe used to smoke sweet-flavored tobacco. It can also be used to smoke other drugs as well. (more…)

Dear Sarita,

I am writing this letter which I am sure has come as a surprise to you. But it definitely would have brought back memories of our college days when we would exchange letters, I wish I had some of them with me today to read. But those carefree days when we would hold our hands and walk through the park, those tasty kulfis which we would relish and long nights where I would keep reading those letters and keep dreaming well in to the night.

Another reason I am writing is that I could not bear to listen to your voice on the phone, it is too painful for me, I still remember when you would keep calling just to persuade me to give our marriage another chance, but I believe I was blinded by the beauty of my colleague then to reconsider my decision to go through a divorce. But I guess it is now too late to think on those issues. (more…)

A friend of mine once took his dad for finishing some errands and to visit some friends. His dad never knew riding I suppose, but from the time he sat behind my friend’s two-wheeler, he kept on giving directions about what to do, when to change gears, when to apply brakes, whether to speed up or slow down, which road to take etc. Since it was his dad, my friend obliged and his dad’s assertions just grew stronger and stronger! At one particular point during their adventurous journey, his dad literally tore him apart for his allegedly irresponsible riding! That was it. The last straw. My friend stopped his vehicle. He asked his dad to get down. When he did, my friend quietly rode off asking him to reach home on a rickshaw!

We have had many a laughs about that incident, and poor uncle learnt a hard lesson that day. Now, by no means have I cited this incident to celebrate my friend’s decision making skills. It was not a good thing by any (Indian) standards. But I have highlighted the incident just to bring to your notice what happens when someone is victimised by back seat driving. Its really bugging when there is someone with you who gives you directions all the time. It’s as if they don’t trust your skills at all and also that they are judging distances and anticipating objects and vehicles better than you! It can be annoying. (more…)

“Dr. I am mad, I don’t have a brain”, were the first sentence I heard during my internship period in a clinical psychologist’s clinic. Next patient softly utters, “Nobody loves me.” Sitting in the room, I realize how many irrational thoughts encompass us: God is angry with me so I am depressed, or I am worthless or I am a failure, I don’t get anything right….

As I sit back and think about the patients and all that they spoke about during the session, I wonder what made them think the way they did. These patients didn’t have evidence to form basis for their thought.

Did they perceive things the way they wanted to? Yes to some extent. (more…)

It’s official! India has added one more dubious distinction to its “shining” cap. In a study conducted by National Crime Record Bureau (NCRB) where they compiled data from 22 countries which included Australia, Argentina, Austria, Bulgaria, Japan, Canada, England and Wales, Germany, Malaysia, New Zealand, Thailand and Srilanka, India has been declared as the ‘murder capital’ of the world!

According to the NCRB report, in 2007 – 08, there were 32,719 incidents of murder recorded in India, which is three times more than its neighbor Pakistan and double the figures in the United States.

Did it catch us by surprise? I don’t think so. The media is peppered with news of gruesome murders every single day. Grover, Aarushi cases are still fresh in our minds. Many other cases go unnoticed. As per the study, India witnessed an average of 90 murders per day! This means that as every hour passes, around four people are murdered in India! A very high number by any standards! (more…)

Poison kills!!??
There is no need to add “kills” behind the word “Poison”. The word “Poison” itself is enough for even a small child to understand, what it does. However, I still chose to title this blog that way, because, sometimes, despite knowing many things, many people under-estimate or misinterpret the effect of the various kinds of poison that they consume or absorb. It is poison, and yet they almost relish it. Its time to shout, “Poison kills, Poison kills!!”

I will talk about “Bitterness“, a big time killer. It sprouts from “Unforgiveness“. How difficult it is to sometimes forgive someone for the way they hurt us? The tendency to not forgive is at times directly proportional to the intensity of the relationship and also to the intensity of the hurt. It becomes more difficult when our own people hurt us. We all, sometime or the other, suffer with this emotion of being hurt and of nurturing unforgiveness and slowly growing bitter inside. (more…)

In my office, my colleagues always find me reading during break time and sometimes even during the day. I am known in my office as a good reader. Sometimes I have good deliberations with my colleagues on reading, and some of them appreciate my habit.

A few days back, when we were discussing on one of the books, one of my colleagues who liked my reading habit, expressed that she herself was not interested much in reading. She would read only when she had to do some documentation at the office. That was her normal reading. She then proceeded to advise me to be practical than being just a reader. (more…)